A big step

I have just taken a really big step - for me. I was thinking about all this yesterday evening, and realised I have come to a bit of a standstill. I've started researching properly, and came to the conclusion that finding a gay guy to coparent with may be the way forward. I found someone, who although is very nice and interesting, is not at all reliable, so I can dismiss him. Now it's time to try something else.

I actually have no idea how much it may cost receiving donor insemination at a fertility clinic, so I don't know whether it is an option or not. I was thinking that it would be great if I could go to California for a couple of months (I have somewhere in LA to stay for free) and have it done there, as their laws seem to be more relaxed. But;
1) It is going to be a massive headfcuk for me going to CA for fertility treatment, knowing that K is in the same state, potentially going to places where we used to go together - also would be stupendously ironic
2) I should at least thoroughly research doing this in the UK before trying this

So I have just called up the "Assisted Conception Unit" at one of the university hospitals in London and got an appointment. I told a teensy fib and said I was a single lesbian. The way I figure it, they cannot refuse to treat lesbians, because surely that would be discrimination. I am so paranoid that if I say I am single and hetero (and also, still only 30), they are just going to laugh in my face and tell me to bugger off and find a husband like any other normal person. Anyway the receptionist I spoke to treated me like it was a matter of course, and I have an appointment next week.

I guess I had better tell my parents about this now at the weekend. They do know I am thinking about it, but don't know that I am actually close-ish to doing this. It will also affect them as I am going to need their assistance with childcare. (Another reason for doing this soon - both parents are kind of fit and able-bodied and not too ancient as yet).